Lessons from Antville

So I've got ants. Those small little black bugs, with little bitty legs that seem able to appear from anywhere or nowhere. I could be sitting on a chair, seemingly antless, when suddenly out of nowhere, what should appear? One little ant calmly walking across my arm. It's amazing what I would do to go back to those days.

Now, it's a full frontal invasion. They sometimes appear to be pouring out of the walls. I may look for that ever hidden entry way, only to see that they look like they're coming in from EVERYWHERE. Sometimes it's hundreds (maybe thousands) and sometimes it's 20, maybe even a few. But I DON'T THINK I CAN TAKE IT ANYMORE.

I've tried to be philosophical, and tell myself "at least it's not OTHER bugs" and "it's only a season" and "they'll eventually be gone". I've tried to be proactive. Z has been spraying diligently, and I've been making sure food's put away or closed up, and the counters are wiped down and dishes done. We've completely cleaned Samantha's room since quite a few seemed to be going in there, and put a line of baking soda around the floor. Which would work except they're coming from the wall or ceiling (how that can be, I don't know). When I woke up yesterday and they were covering the ENTIRE kitchen trash can and walking up the cupboard wall, and across the ceiling by the cupboards and through a little hole, I stayed calm and figured, well at least I've discovered an opening. But when they were biting my legs last night as I tried to scrapbook (I discovered a little line on the floor!) I thought ENOUGH! And I began considering going with an exterminator just to relieve some of the problem.

This morning I woke up at about 5 a.m. in extreme pain and barely able to move due to a muscle spasm or something in my neck/upper back. I quickly realized that driving wasn't going to be an option since I could barely move my head and today became a work from home day. Luckily my schedule wasn't too full and my supervisees were willing to come to my house or reschedule. Samantha quickly realized something was wrong with me and asked if she could pray for me, and then ran to get her Bible to help too. (Such a sweet girl!) She grabbed her Princess devotional book and asked me to read a page and what do you think it was about? ANTS!!! I couldn't believe it, but there it was:

"Go watch the ants, you lazy person. Watch what they do and be wise. Ants have so commander. They have no leader or ruler. But they store up food in the summer. They gather their supplies at harvest. How long will you lie there, you lazy person? When will you get up from sleeping? You sleep a little; you take a nap. You fold your hands and rest. So you will be as poor as if you had been robbed. You will have as little as if you have been held up." Proverbs 6:6-11

The following devotional talked about how Solomon wants us to get better at doing the work that needs to be done...if you know what your job is, just do it. Stop complaining, etc. The devotional tells the little girls to "be an ant today" look around for things that need to be done and DO THEM.

I was struck by how much this could apply to me!! I can't tell you how long my to-do list is. How many years I've been 'meaning' to get something done. And yet, I've been able to mark so little off my list. Why? Because I wait, I'm always waiting. For the right moment, the right help, for Z to agree to it's a good plan, to not be so tired....I could come up with a million reasons (ahem, excuses) as to why my list remains so long. I so often look around and see what needs to be done, and I IGNORE it! I don't know why. I just do. From the simple picking up the paper on the floor, to the redoing of a bookshelf. I just don't do it. And then I'm frustrated with myself, with my house, with everything, for not being the way I want it to be.

Even in my work, I need a little more work to make ends meet a little more comfortably. But I'm not doing anything about it. I sit around daydreaming rather than working to make something change. In my ministry, there are things that need to be done, but I am not as proactive as I'd like to be.

My house is not going to magically become the house of my dreams. And due to various reasons (primarily financial) there are many projects that just cannot get done. But there's no reason the walls can't be painted, or curtains can't be made. I've had a pillowcase hanging in my kitchen door window for YEARS as I waited to make one. I've got a sewing machine, lots of fabric, and even if none of that fabric works, a yard or two of fabric wouldn't cost much. And why hasn't it been done? I DON'T KNOW!! I tell myself, that I can't do it when the kids are awake, but then I can't do it when they're asleep. I don't have the space, I don't have the time, I don't have, I don't have.

EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES. I'm so tired of myself and my excuses! If I don't have it's because I haven't gotten, or I haven't created, or I haven't done. Yes, I may not be able to afford to replace the kitchen cupboards, and they're really not worth painting. But if that's my only option to recreate the kitchen, than why not? Instead of being a "lazy person" and sitting around waiting for something to happen, I need to keep working. A little bit everyday will make huge changes. Get off the computer! Put the book down! It's hot, oh well! We have no air conditioning, oh well! Come on! Let's move. Maybe then, I'll see some changes. Maybe then I'll lose some weight. Maybe then I'll make some more money. Time will tell, but really, it's time to do something. Again. And that, Grasshopper, are my lessons from antville.