How do I get there?

Okay, so I was reading another blog today and she had written back in January a statement that went a little something like this:

We do not pray because God will [do what we are praying for].

We praise Him because He can.

That statement just stopped me cold. How is it that I forget that sometimes? How is it that time passes and something I was feverently praying for is no longer top of my list, or sometimes no longer on my list at all. Prayer is sometimes (often) a struggle for me. I can't seem to focus and talk to God without losing track of what I'm trying to do. I find my mind wondering, I think about what I have to do that day, tomorrow, the next minute. I end up feeling horrible, like I've failed at what should be the easiest thing...communicating with God. I've asked numerous people how they pray, how they feel when they pray, do they feel like they're communicating with God. These are all people who seem so spiritual and so in touch with God. The closest I come to feeling that in touch with God is when I'm in worship and praise through song. But I long for it, I want more of it, I want to feel God's everpresent nearness in every minute and in everything I do. So I ask, how do I get there?

I've been keeping prayer journals over the last few years, although not as consistently as I would like. I find that my biggest fault is that I don't plan for or make specific time available for me and God. And I don't always know if I'm praying for something to go one way or another. I've been working, mostly, at trying to be better at just praying for His will. Whatever that may be, I want to know what it is so that I can live by it. Trying to remember always, Jeremiah 29:11 'For I know the plans I have for you...plans to proster you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.' When and if I keep that in mind, I find that my prayer goes exactly where it needs to be. But being the strong-willed, determined person that I seem to be, I tend to forget (or choose to overlook) that God has his plan already lined up. I need only seek him and his guidance. It's usually only after I've tried to make it fit into the picture that I want (usually numerous times) that I figure out that I've been going against the grain all along. Craziness, I know, but there it still is.

Anyway, this post started with the comment from another blog and led to all this because it reminded me that in my prayer life, I need not pray necessarily for God to do what I want, but to pray for him to show me how to do what He wants and, no matter what, to praise Him that He could do what I want, even if it's not His choice.